my life [recently] in words

Alrigh~t. Here's a post to that catches myself up on a lot of things. These past couple of weeks have been physically demanding, given the demand of work and my participation in SGI activities. With regards to work, a lot of it has to do with simply managing the docket and the schedule for the court and chambers so that my Judge is ready to go and do his thing. Of course, while I'm doing that, I'm also responsible for substantive legal work, and balancing everything, I found, is quite the task. That requires me to let go of any doubts I have in my own mind that I am incapable of finishing everything - something I deal with everyday.

But that's also the reason why I enjoy participating in my buddhist activities. As much as it takes to go to a meeting after work, I enjoy it because I have a chance to refresh my determination. I found that if I concentrate on my work to an extreme, I begin very easily losing a sense of purpose. It's hard to realize that when you're simply thinking that you have to finish this or that, but there's really no end to that way of thinking. It's been important to me to develop a context for my dedication to my work and to refocus my determination on fulfilling my intents.

A moment to appreciate life!

As a way of example, I had the honor of helping lead a Gosho lecture today after getting off work late. The Gosho that we studied is "The Sutra of True Requital." Aside from learning what requital meant and how it's really pronounced, my study of this particular correspondence helped me to renew my sense of mission, and just as importantly, my day to day goals. This particular gosho made me realize that a sense of appreciation builds in oneself a greater purpose for one's life, and as a consequence, helps us reveal our own buddhahood. That's counter-intuitive to the way we think of dealing with despair - western thought teaches us to feel better about ourselves and to cope with your own sense of identity. While that of course helps, Buddhism teaches us that by realizing the kindness and compassion of others - no matter how small or indiscernible - that teaches us to value our own life. In other words, it's a realization that we make that we are truly and inherently noble. So the act of acknowledging the compassion of others - the first step to appreciation - is a basis for own happiness.

So I've been enjoying myself. In fact, my Judge was kind enough to invite me to Maryland Legal Aid Society's 100th anniversary celebration. To say the least, this was an amazing event. In all honesty, I rediscovered the power that the law can serve in helping the disadvantaged. I learned that my Judge is particularly a great example of dedication to help those in need, and for that reason alone, my job is fulfilling and satisfying. The open bar and the waterfront location also helped to make the event awesome.

Unlike the past few months, I have a few bucks to spend now, so I spent last saturday, before the Legal Aid Celebration, checking out a brunch place in Baltimore - the well-known "Blue Moon Cafe." I had the stacked hashbrowns with crab and cheese. That was pretty darn good.